Nanny Knows Best

Nanny Knows Best
Dedicated to exposing, and resisting, the all pervasive nanny state that is corroding the way of life and the freedom of the people of Britain.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Nanny Bans Triangular Flapjacks


I am hugely gemused to see that Nanny's chums from Castle View School on Canvey Island have got their collective knickers into a twist over triangular flapjacks.

For why?

It seems that the little "scamps" who attend the school have been lobbing them around, and a pupil was slightly injured.

What is Nanny's solution?

Cut the triangles into squares or rectangles!

One small problem, does not a square/rectangle also have sharp corners?

However, kudos to Nanny's Health and Safety Executive for rushing to defend flapjacks:
"We often come across half-baked decisions taken in the name of health and safety, but this one takes the biscuit. The real issue isn't what shape the flapjacks are, but the fact that pupils are throwing them at each other - and that's a matter of discipline, and has got nothing to do with health and safety as we know it. We're happy to make clear that flapjacks of all shapes and sizes continue to have our full backing."
Whilst we are on the subject, I have never eaten a flapjack in my life; and I don't think I ever will! I have, however, eaten pancakes.

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3 comments:

  1. Ah The safety Elf......When Nanny uses the term "It's 'Elf'n'Safety" it basically means shut up and do as you're told......It is one of Nanny's coveralls just like, child protection, climate change, various ists, isms and phobes and equality......When Nanny cites any of the aforementioned, she means, shut up and do as you're told.......Seeing that our local schools have hi-viz vests as part of their school uniforms, I suspect it is only a matter of time before kids won't be allowed out at breaktime without hard hats, toe tectors, hi-viz, ear protectors and eye protectors......I would hate to be a kid growing up today.

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  2. Lord of Atlantis12:02 PM

    Why doesn't Nanny go the whole hog, Tonk, and insist nobody can venture outside unless they are wearing a full suit of plate armour, bright yellow hi-viz coloured of course!

    "We often come across half-baked decisions taken in the name of health and safety, but this one takes the biscuit. The real issue isn't what shape the flapjacks are, but the fact that pupils are throwing them at each other - and that's a matter of discipline, and has got nothing to do with health and safety as we know it. We're happy to make clear that flapjacks of all shapes and sizes continue to have our full backing."

    Well done, on this occasion to the HSE. They are absolutely correct. Instead of banning things, it is high time some discipline was brought back into our homes and schools. I realise the liberal, do-gooders won't like it, but TOUGH! It is their politically correct nonsense that has got this country (and others) into the mess they are currently in!

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  3. Friday last the area had a spluttering of wet snow on top of soaking wet ground. One secondary school pupil suffered a slip on school grounds and needed the attendance of an ambulance.
    Nanny's knickers were in an instant twist so the entire school of over 600 pupils were sent home even though the school day hadn't even started.
    By 10-00am the snow had turned to rain and the bit on the ground was washed away. By 1-00pm the wind had blow dried the roads and pavements!

    But best of all some prat came out with the 'the school has a duty of care' bullshit and she is a the local shop manager for...... Save The Farkin Children!

    ReplyDelete